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Presidential Directive Sparks Outcry from Map Makers.

WASHINGTON (XF) - The Xsociate Files has learned that as part of a recent executive order, map makers would be required to redraw world maps to depict the US sharing a border with Venezuela. The decree has elicited criticism world wide because the change would include not only atlases but other reference material such as school text books and encyclopedias as well.

Press Secretary Tony Snow, hoping to allay concerns, says that President Bush has thought the matter through carefully and feels that he had made the right decision.

"The President understand the concerns that people have about this," Mr. Snow said at a recent press gaggle. "A major concern is the expense. Which is why the President is working with the Congress on emergency funds to help defer the cost of this endeavor."

When asked about the reason for the change, Mr. Snow stated that it was mainly due to the anti-American rhetoric from Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez. "That, and we hope this will make it easier for Americans to actually find Venezuela on a map."

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I really think that while were at it, we may as well simple add all the Canadian provinces to the US as new states. I mean really, when the defication really hits the rotary oscillator, we're going to need those tar sands. Not to mention the timber...the timber! No need for a messy invasion. Just annex by map modification.

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