« Home

Paris Liberated

Paris Hilton, whose only appreciable contribution to society is far less than those advocated by her supporters, has flown the coop. Apparently she was able to wrest herself free from the bonds of justice by doing what she does best: crying and whining until she gets her way.

Of course the official story is that her sentence was commuted to house arrest because of a "medical problem" which had developed during her five days spent behind bars. Most likely she had an allergic reaction to the reality that the world does not in fact revolve around her blond maned cranium like so many paparazzi satellites.

Now we must endure the endless stream of news cycles discussing her harrowing time in lockdown while we wait for the tell all book to hit the store shelves this fall. My money's on it being a pop-up book given how flat and two dimensional the participants are.

Update: Martin Lewis has an idea on how to rehabilitate Paris and another high profile jailbird.

(Filed at State of the Day)